To A Glorious Destiny

Hmmm

2010-10-16T19:39:00.000-07:00

Once again I find myself a little pensive about my trip. I will try to share a few highlights though.

Building Hope:
The purpose of our trip was to build the second floor of a two story building that will serve as a church and a multi-purpose center for retreats/outreaches. With a handful of beastly men, a small group of volunteers from the church, and a mighty team of 4 girls (I count myself as one of the girls, even though you might have pegged me as a "beastly man"), we completed our goal. Framing in place, columns up, and second floor completed (they will complete the first floor with materials they are used to working with). Go team! A contractor stopped by one of the last days and said that it would have taken him two months to complete what we did in two weeks (with a largely untrained team). God is good!

Now, if you know me (and you probably do if you are reading this), I might forget to tell you that we built a building. Why? Because it was a detail. It was a fruit of greater things that God is doing.

So here comes the "good stuff" :)

This past New Year, Vanesa and Abigail (daughters of the pastoral family...and Vane was the one who God took home in February) did an activity where they made little signs with words like Strenght, Prayer, Faith, Friendship, Hope, Love, etc. And each member of the family had to pick one and give it to someone else in the family and explain why. Pastor Jorge was given two: Strength and Hope. You can imagine how significant these became at the loss of his daughter two months later.

After a series of God interventions, everything was underway with the purchasing of the property and the building. On the sixth month anniversary of Vane's passing, they signed the final papers to purchase the property. As they remembered her and reflected on past experiences, Pastor Jorge suggested that they name the building...Hope...after the sign he had been given at New Years. The next week our first builders from the team showed up to Argentina. Dennis (our head constructor), handed Pastor Jorge a newpaper article that had run in the Fountain Hills local paper. The title of it read, "Vice Mayor [Dennis] builds hope". The rest of the article does not mention hope in any way. It was just God's present and continued confirmation that He is all over everything that was transpiring (and has transpired).

I love when He does that. I love watching that He has been PERSISTANT and RELENTLESS in pouring out His grace, favor, and strength upon this family that is so dedicated to serving Him. He is just like that.

For me personally, it was wonderful. He was so near to me. He spoke constantly. Not about my future. Not about the plans. Just stuff that my heart needed to hear. I want more of Him. Always. There is nothing better.

Round Two- Ding!

2010-09-30T22:52:00.001-07:00

A whole four and a half minutes later, I am on my way back to Argentina!

God is so good. He has been so amazing through this whole process. I am excited to go back having grown in areas of my heart and having seen some transformation in myself. The biggest transformation is that I know longer NEED to know the plan for my future. I am not in a hurry to find out the next steps. I am SO LOVING this process and loving the ONE taking me through the process, that I just don't care anymore. I trust Him. He is doing wonderful things. He will show me when the time is right. It is yummy. He is yummy.

I have been so bless by how many of you have really come around me in prayer. I am seeing the fruit! Please keep it up!!

Pray that:
1. Our eyes will be on Him and the big picture of what He is doing. That we would not get caught up or distracted with things that don't have eternal purpose.
2. He would speak TO each of us and THROUGH each of us.
3. The details of building in a foreign country come together. It has been a challenge and we need God to work it out.
4. That the team would be UNIFIED and protected from the enemy.

...and for me personally, please pray for eyes to see and ears to hear. I just want to know His heart. I want to be close and know what He is doing. I want wisdom. I want to be able to share His heart with others. I want to be used.

Oh, and pray that my man hands don't get any more manly with all the construction. I enjoy being a girl. That's not too much for a girl to ask, right? (translation- pray that I find my place in service. You might not realize this, but I am not pretty scrawny and weak. Pray that I don't get totally jacked up trying to keep up with people of normal strength!!)

Blessings and love to each of you!!!

Deep Breath

2010-08-13T21:00:00.000-07:00

Thank you all for your patience in getting this update. It is a soft spot for me even still, but I want to be able to share it with you.

This journey started so long ago for me in my traumatic uprooting from Colombia. These past two years have been (and still are) about healing, growth, and the refining of my calling. God birthed in me a desire to go down with the team to Argentina, and miraculously provided for me to go not once, but twice. As the plane was landing, the song playing in my ipod was "Tu has sido fiel, tu has sido fiel, siempre has sido fiel..." (You have been faithful, You have been faithful, You have always been faithful...).

From the moment we landed, I was just overwhelmed with GRATITUDE that He would have picked me for this experience. That feeling of "who am I, Lord, that You would pick me for this?" It was such a special, intimate thing to be a part of, that I often felt undeserving (in a good way).

Ministry Highlights-

The motive for this trip was to reopen Punchinello. Punchinello is an arts school for children, opened by Vanessa Szczecko three years ago. Amazing woman of God. A couple of years older than me. Just a woman that left imprints on the hearts of every single person she met. And about four months ago, the Lord decided that He couldn't resist having her away from heavenly home any more and brought her home. He healed her cancer permanently. So we went down to be a support to the pastoral family, and to throw the re-opening party. Out of privacy and respect of the family, I am not going to go into detail here and will just focus on my own experience.

I just felt very CONNECTED and honored to be a part of it. I had been praying for the school and over the new leader (also named Vanessa), so it was good to be able to see first hand that the Lord is being faithful to raise up the Joshua (as He had given me to pray), and that He is being faithful to give her the same grace and anointing to lead these children to the "Promised Land".

It was also super fun to involved with kids. Not my full-time calling, but I love to speak/teach for kids. (Pastor Bobby spoke, and I translated both into Spanish...and into children...and I love that!)

Another highlight was speaking at Rivadavia, one of their church plants in an impoverished (physically, emotionally, and spiritually) neighborhood. Months ago, I had an impression that I would speak there. I prayed about it for a couple of months and for the life of me, God would not show me what He wanted me to talk about. Minutes before service started, David asked me if I was going to share or not and it became clear to me. It was to be the first time I would share about my last two years in a public setting, as a form of praise and worship to God for having carried me thus far. I had a woman come up to me after and tell me that she was not from the church, but God told her to go to this service that night. She said that it was exactly what she needed to hear. I walked away from the experience reaaaally missing preaching. I didn't realize it, but man, I am so passionate about sharing about God's character and testifying to His goodness to a captive audience. I hope my roommate likes the new pulpit I've placed outside her bathroom.

The night before we left, I had quite a break down. I felt so...conflicted. I had so much expectation going into it (come on...you don't provide miraculously for me to go down and not have me wondering what You're up to...). I was hoping for writing on the wall. "YES DESTENI, THIS IS WHAT I HAVE FOR YOU! DEPARTURE DATE...MARCH 3, 2011 AT 7:14AM!!!" But that did not happen. I felt like God had opened up all these desires and began to question whether or not He was ever going to have "a place" for me (where American/Latina Desteni gets to be one whole person). So I had a bubble of emotion and doubt swell up in me. And beautiful God, so faithful...I opened my Bible and it landed on the verse "Do not be impatient for the Lord to act. Travel steadily on the path and He will honor you and give you the land." (insert ugly cry). I went to write the verse in my journal, and when I opened to the next page, the quote on top was, "Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've always imagined." (ugly cry turned into gymnastic facial contortion).

So to answer the big question on everyone's minds, "Are you thinking about moving down there?" I am traveling steadily on the path. I still have stuff to learn here. And I am praying about it. If you know me at all, you know that I don't make decisions emotionally or do what seems most obvious, just because it is obvious. If God gives me a green light, I think it would be a good fit. I am trying not to prematurely get attached to the idea and have it just be a stepping stone to something else. My job is to be here, now, and finish the process that I began.

I will be there again in a month and a half. I appreciate everyone's prayers. Whatever He is doing, it is good. And I will be ready, and everyone else will be ready, when it is time.

Round One

2010-07-29T19:06:00.000-07:00

I leave for Argentina in the morning. (You probably didn't know since I hardly talk about it...wait...)

I feel excited, nervous, expectant, happy, worried...lots of things! I have so much on my mind that I cannot really articulate at the moment. You will have to wait until I get home and can process a bit.

Specific prayer requests:

1. Safety in travel for ourselves and our luggage :). I would LOVE for our luggage to make it there with us.
2. That I would be open for God to use me in the way that He wants to (and not be confined to my own ideas of how He has used me in the past).
3. That He would speak to me. That He would give me eyes to see and hears to hear.
4. That I would have the confidence and faith to step out.
5. That I would be able to translate for Pastor Bobby without anyone getting injured. :)

See you on the flip side!

Blessed

2010-07-04T08:32:00.000-07:00

I am so blessed. God never ceases to amaze me and surprise me. He is so faithful and good and persistant. I think He is altogether Yummy.

Recently I was really struggling with Him with some things regarding my future, my calling, and these trips to Argentina. I had pretty much given up on the October trip, since our first payment deadline was in a couple of weeks and I was still short on the first trip. I was having a battle in myself between my intellect (what is smart, reasonable, and responsible) and my intuition (knowledge in my spirit that something is going on). I finally cried out to Him that I needed Him to INTERVENE and to speak to me.

Oh goodness. Ask and you shall receive. Seek and you shall find. Knock and the door will be opened to you. I think He was on the edge of His seat waiting for me to ask. That day, out of the blue, everyone I was in contact with had something to say about my name ("wait, what does that have to do with anything...oh, her name is Destiny...I get it.") People who have known me for years and are over the novelty of it. God was just stirring in me the fact that I am created with a specific destiny. My name is no accident. It is a part of who I am and what He is doing with me.

Then, very unexpectedly, I received a very generous donation in mail towards my trips that fully paid off my first trip and put me well on my way for the second. I cried. I went into the accounting office and cried. I cried in a box. I cried with a fox. I was SO GRATEFUL how the Lord not only provided, but spoke to my heart and affirmed, "Yes, Desteni, you are not imagining this. You are following me. I am doing real things in your life."

And if that were not enough, He has decided to speak to me constantly. Now, I believe that God is always trying to communicate with us, but I mean speaking to me in a particular way. For example, I had three people pray over me VERBATIM the exact same prayer. "Lord, give Desteni the HOPE and the FAITH to be able to reach her DESTINY." It wasn't on topic. And we weren't even praying over one another. People just took it upon themselves to pray for me.

And you know what else I love? He has been speaking correction to me. Areas of my heart that still need to be dealt with in order to make me a trustworthy vessel. Wish it could be done overnight, but I love walking it out with Him.

Please refer to my Prayer Requests on the side if you'd like to be a part of my prayer team. I feel like it is a very key time for me and I would appreciate people advocating for me in prayer.

If you'd like to help financially (I still need about $1400 to fund the rest of the October trip), please send checks made to City of Grace (with Desteni-Argentina in the memo) to 655 E University Dr, Mesa, AZ 85203 ATTN: Outreach.

Thanks.

"That's all I gotta say about that..."

Awakening to Desire

2010-05-29T13:02:00.000-07:00

Desire is a dangerous thing. Desire opens you up for a whole world of vulnerability, risk, and potential disappointment. Desire will either take you on an adventure of faith and trust or burn your spirit.

I have spent the majority of my life avoiding desire. If I do not want and if I do not have any expectation of abundance, I cannot be disappointed. I am a master at "getting by". At staying safe.

Have I experienced the amazing generosity of God? Absolutely. How could I ever forget my experience in Spain, and living 100% in faith for every single meal for an entire month, never knowing where our next meal was going to come from? I will never forget how He not only met my physical needs, but also gave me the desires of my heart. I will never forget how He was IN MY FACE, challenging me with, "You cannot possibly even ASK for more than what I am willing to give you." Yet so often I find myself like ground that is so dry that it is unable to absorb the rainfall.

My prayer for myself right now, is that I would become incredible at receiving. In every area of my life. That I would make room for desire and allow God to either wow me in providing, or to help me see the bigger picture in not providing and allow Him to comfort me. I just long for my heart to be such a fertile place.

I have been invited to go to Argentina not once, but twice this year. In July, they are reopening the art school for underprivileged children after having lost their beloved leader in her battle with cancer early this year. I am not sure what my specific role will be. I believe that God wants to use me, though, in ways He has used me before. And I still believe that I am to go on the October trip as well.

Going once was stretching to my faith. Not going to lie. After being home for two years, I do not have my support base as I did before. Going twice? I am having to conquer some big fears of allowing myself to want it, then not being provided for. Of being disappointed. I am going to go for it though, and see what the Lord would do with it. I am going to put myself in a position of vulnerability and see what amazing things He has for me, either in going on both, or in blessing my heart with some greater lesson.

If you would like to help me go, I am going to need to raise about $3000 above what I have already raised. Checks can be made out to City of Grace, with Desteni-Argentina in the memo and sent to:

City of Grace
655 E University Drive
Mesa, AZ 85203
ATTN: Outreach

I have already been incredibly blessed by a handful of people who have already come alongside me. And I am realizing that I am equally as grateful for the words of encouragement that have come in as I am with the financial gifts. So if you want to pray for me and send a word of encouragement, that would be amazing! You can send it to the same address and it will get to me.

In the Journey Together,
Desteni

My Own Resurrection

2010-04-05T15:38:00.000-07:00

"My lover spoke and said to me, 'Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, and come with me. See! The winter is past; the rains are over and gone. Flowers appear on the earth; the season of singing has come...Arise, come, my darling; my beautiful one, come with me.'" Song of Songs 2:10-13

Word that I have been waiting and waiting and waiting to hear...YES, Desteni, this is what I want for you.

Around New Year, God confirmed in my heart that yes, missions are a part of my DNA. I am most alive, most fulfilled, most effective, when I am serving in missions. I began to pray about the place, the timing, etc. I still love Colombia, so I presented God with my plan to work on the island of Bocachica with Karen and Jorge. My answer was consistent...wait. Don't worry about your future. Don't fret about tomorrow. Your future is in my hands. I would try my best to surrender for the day, and in the morning I'd get the same word. (I am a fast learner, Folks!)

I didn't "get it" until I went to coffee with a friend of mine. She was sharing with me her own journey, and how God called her to "give up her love of Guatemala". I burst into tears. Full on crying in the coffee shop as I listened to her talk. She continued to share how she would always love Guatemala, but she was holding onto it in her OWN love. God totally convicted me that I was holding onto Colombia with my own love. It was as if I was trying to manipulate God to send me back through loving Colombia enough. I finally surrendered. I cannot receive the good things He has for me if I insist on what it looks like. I took on the attitude of, "if this is what He wants, great, if not, I am going to serve in the way that He chooses with gratitude".

Soon after, out of nowhere, He began to stir in me a desire to go on our church's mission trip to Argentina. This made NO SENSE to me. (Still doesn't make a whole lot of sense!) First, I am not huge into short term stuff. If I am going to fly across the world, I want to be there for awhile. Second, it is a CONSTRUCTION team. I don't even need to elaborate why that is not a great fit for me...but I will. "Aleah, can you open this Gatorade bottle for me?" And third, I don't have any long term plans of going. But in my surrendered state, I began to seek the Lord on it.

Little by little, He began confirming that YES this IS what He wants for me. I was given the green light by my directors and the team leader a couple of days ago.

I can't even explain what it means to me. Seriously, I don't care what it is. He could have told me that He was sending me to the local Taco Bell to serve. I am just SO touched and excited that He has spoken to me about it. That He is leading me with something other than WAIT.

He has even started to stir in me some of my giftings that have been on loving "hold" during this season.

I am just so touched to be seeing the first fruits of the Spring after a long, cold winter. I am thankful that my season of resurrection is beginning.

If you would like to help me go on this trip, I am asking people to participate in what I am calling 17.20.6.

I am looking for 17 people to support me $20 a month for the next 6 months. (I was going to say that it comes from a certain verse in the Bible and come up with something totally random. But when I went to look up verses in 17:26, they were totally encouraging and appropriate like 1 Chron 17:26 O Lord, you are God! You have promised these good things to your servant).

Anyway, if you'd like to be one of the 17, please send checks made out to City of Grace with Desteni-Argentina in the memo to

City of Grace
655 E University Drive
Mesa, AZ
ATTN: Outreach

And obviously, if you want to help with a one time gift or a different amount, I am not going to send it back to you and send you hate mail.

I will be posting prayer request as the process continues. I am excited for what God is doing and know that nothing of significance happens w/o prayer!

Thanks for going on this journey with me.

Season of Gratitude

2009-11-11T05:25:00.000-08:00

So, I am sure most people have given up on my blog since I pretty much stopped writing in it upon return from Colombia. I am seeing something go around though and I have been inspired to participate. I want to spend this season writing about things for which I am grateful.

Today, I am grateful that God brought me into recovery programs. I had been living my life as a reaction to my fear and pain. And each day, I am learning to face my fears and take responsibility for all of my actions. I feel more centered and grounded than I ever have in my life, and I am excited to see what the Lord has for me once I am out of "the desert".

Still Alive!

2009-07-23T14:37:00.000-07:00

My life changes every 37.2 seconds. Not by my choice, mind you. If God left things up to me, we would all stay the same, all the time (unless, of course, I had an agenda to change YOU to make me more comfortable). It would seem, however, that God is not looking for a personal assistant (I offered! "I am qualified!! I have IDEAS!!" and He politely declined), so things keep a'changin.

So what the heck has been going on with me the last 7 months?
I moved. Three times. And I am on the brink of another transition as my beloved roommate is sadly moving to California. (I could be wrong, but I am beginning to suspect that there is some kind of lesson that I am not learning...) So that has not been fun in terms of stability, but I have gotten to live with some really great people, which was a huge blessing.

I am still working at my church in the outreach department, which is also a huge blessing. I do not believe that it was at all coincidence that God placed me in this position. He totally opened the door there. It has not always been an easy process for different difficulties beyond anyone's control, but even in that, I am learning that God is faithful and He is good.

And because God LOVES me, He opened the door for me to teach at GED class to English learners in the spring. That was a new experience, but I loved it! I loved my students (all latinos!!).

"So, Desteni, how are you?" (head slightly tilted to the right).

I have been in a wonderful process. Has it been easy? About as easy as brain surgery in a row boat. It has been so hard and so uncomfortable, but sooo good. Tackling my issue with codependency is seriously revolutionizing my life. I am learning to change behavior/thoughts that are damaging to myself. I am learning that I have CHOICES. I am learning to own and deal with my own feelings, while requiring that others deal with theirs (I always felt responsible for everyone's feelings and needed to make everyone feel good). I am learning to be NICE to myself. (I would probably be in jail if I treated others the way I treated myself, in terms of expections, perfection, brutality over mistakes, etc). So it has been good. I still have a long way to go, but I am encouraged. I am hopeful that God is leading me to a glorious destiny.

"So, Desteni, are you going to go back?"
You know, I still am not putting pressure on myself to make that decision. I have a lot of resentment to work through still that would keep me from being objective at this point. I do know that my perceptions of what happened were/are distorted because of my codependence. I do know that I love Colombia. I miss it like crazy. I feel most alive when I am serving in missions. I am still passionate about the work there. We will see. I believe 100% that when it is time to make a decision that God will guide me and I will have peace. He's good like that ;)

What is immediately on my plate? I am going to lead a weekend trip to Agua Prieta, Mexico to serve at an orphanage. I went in February and it was great! There are so really awesome kids there.

Stay tuned for pictures...

Update on the Baby Shower

2008-07-06T10:01:00.000-07:00

Something else pretty exciting also ocurred the first night of the brigade. I got a phone call from the girl we did the baby shower for. The babies were born, and we were the first people she called!! A healthy little boy and girl. I was seriously so touched though. She had literally just given birth and called us!

Ministry Stories

2008-07-06T09:53:00.000-07:00

The young couple
One of the first days of the brigade, I received a young couple in counseling. Now, there are times when I am in counseling and I say what I think needs to be heard, but it is not like every time I go in, I feel like God is speaking through me. That was not the case here. We started talking about their marriage and they were really getting what I said. Then, according to what I was hearing from the both of them, I started to go a little deeper with the husband. We started talking about his childhood and he just lost it. He lived a TERRIBLE life of abuse, violence, even slavery. I challenged him to forgive the people who hurt him out loud. He couldn´t, but I could tell he really wanted to. So I encouraged the wife to take the kids and to give him the space where he could get alone to do that. They left. Hours later, I saw him walk by. He looked like a different man. Seriously. He saw me from afar and I gave him a questioning ¨thumbs up¨sign (communicating, "Did you do it?"). He nodded and smiled and kept walking. Later that night, he went to the evangelistic campaign and went forward to receive the Lord. It was awesome!

Pictures from the Brigade

2008-07-02T18:12:00.001-07:00

Outreach Update Armenia

2008-05-05T10:59:00.000-07:00

We survived the first week of outreach! (Applause...)
Ok, we got here and instantly feel in love with everyone. Seriously. You would have thought that we knew these people our whole lives. However, the pastor (woman) came up to me and started to tell me everything she had in mind. I fell unconscious half way through...it was an onslaught of activities to go at the same rate she was talking...a JILLION miles a minute. All I got out of it was that I wasn..t going to sleep for a week! (I love the pastor, btw)
So, we did more activities than what was healthy for the team, but it turned out SO GOOD!!! God has really put on my heart what it means to really be like Jesus. I mean, I can have all the information in the world, preach, lead Bible studies, be a missionary, but do I really look like Jesus? Do we as a church look like Jesus? I would venture to say that we don..t in many areas. That I don..t. Jesus was know for accepting people and for serving. For living outside of the structure. He was known for love.
With this fresh in my mind, Trinity and I started talking to some woman in the park. This girl was 21 years old, had a four yr old girl, a 2 yr old, and was pregnant with twins. We were getting along really well. They were super sweet. And I asked her if they did baby showers here. She said that they did. She said they did one last week, and confided that they had spent a large amount of money for them to through this party and only one person came and gave her some shampoo for the baby. She was just trouble and told me, "We don..t even have any clothes to receive the children in." So I asked her all excited, "Can we give you a baby shower?!!!" She was embarassed, but excited. So we did. My team, along with the church, gave this girl a baby shower. It was so special!!!!! Seriously. With no intentions, no strings attached, we just got to express love and acceptance to her and help her in her need. And God totally used it. She went to two services this week and started a relationship with the Lord. She asked me a bunch of questions and we got her a Bible that we all signed. It was so awesome.
I wish I had more time to tell all the stories from this week. There were just very permanent things that happened. Fruit that lasts. I will try to post some pictures soon. I don..t have a camera anymore, so I have to wait and borrow them from the girls on the team.
Please keep praying for us!

Hello...?

2008-04-17T09:20:00.000-07:00

Did Desteni die? No, no she didn't. Here I am, Folks! I figured that my birthday was enough news to last a couple of months!!

We have now wrapped up the lecture phase of this school. These students have been incredible. They are YOUNG. I am taking two girls who just turned 16, and two 17 yr olds (I think). But they are amazing. They have been self motivated, teachable, passionate. It has been such a pleasure working with them!

The highlight of the lecture phase was definitely Missions Week. Now, we do this every semester, but this time was different. Normally, we assigned different continents to the staff and students and they are in charge of decorating a part of the house and doing a presentation during the week so that we can all intercede together. But in the past couple of semesters, it had really turned into presentations of countries and less prayer. So we made a lot of changes.

This year, we really wanted the students to EXPERIENCE the culture, so that by the time we got to intercession, they would be more IDENTIFIED with what the people were living. We also had the students pray and have God put a country on their hearts, so students were assigned according to the places God had given them. We all dressed according the the given country every day, we practiced their customs, we lived under the same bondage that they do (I'll explain more with the pictures below).

And God showed up. We talked to the base director in a Middle Eastern base to share his testimony with us to start the week, then to end the week with a challenge via skype :) From the beginning, we felt like God was calling us to TAKE ACTION and not to just intercede. And the closing night...wow...I get goosebumps just thinking about it.

The director shared with us about God's desire for unreached people in closed countries. He challenged the idea of praying and praying and waiting for God to hit us with a lightning bolt to go into these countries. He told about what God is doing where he is working and the vision he had. I was ready to start packing to go work with him.

Next, it just so happened that a team from Denver was here and had a girl from Nepal. This was one of the countries that God had REALLY put on some of the girls' hearts. So she shared and again, it was exactly what God was trying to tell us. We had everyone who felt like God was calling them get up and we prayed over them. It was so profound. It is one of those things that you can't put into words. We were all GIDDY afterwards. Even into the next day. A holy giddiness. Two of our girls received calls to Nepal. So clearly. One of those transcendental moments in life for them.

And it was so amazing for me because my heart has always been to see Latinos going into these closed nations. So I got to pray over them, sending them, next to Jhonny and Enith who have the same passion. I felt full.

This is Maria Elena and Carolina (l to r). Maria was one of the girls called to Nepal. She is also going on outreach with me!

On the day the Muslim countries presented, we prayed five times a day, facing East. We prayed to God though. We thought that would be a better idea. You know.
There we are praying over those that were called on the last night.
Paola (right) was crying so hard I though we were going to have to throw her in the pool. God rocked her world that night, calling her to Nepal. There she is standing with the guest from Nepal.

Jhonny and I after a satisfying week of intercession. (Note- I had been crying, too. Don't worry. I haven't given up on make-up).

Another big thing that happened was that Trinity was baptised, and I got to help! It was such a huge priviledge. It was beautiful and MEANINGFUL. You can see a video of it if you would like on youtube under trinitypratt. There are three parts. The first video is in Spanish, so if you don't speak spanish, it might not be exciting for you. But the second video is in English.

Next Monday Trinity and I will be headed out Armenia (Coffee Land, Colombia) for two months leading an outreach team. "Where is Rachel??," you might be asking yourself. Rachel is going to the States for a couple of months to get training for the ministry that they are founding here, Life Alternatives. AAANNNDDD, God just opened the doors for us to rent the house NEXT DOOR. This is huge. So we took a leap of faith and rented it, believing this was from God and we are waiting to see how he will come through with the finances. We definitely don't have the funds as of yet to pay for it! We all believe though that God has blessed this, so it should be exciting to see how He will manifest His faithfulness!!

Oh Happy Day

2008-02-01T02:13:00.000-08:00

Inner Healing

2008-01-31T02:34:00.000-08:00

This week Rachel and I were asked to help teach the class on Inner Healing to the DTS students. We were both pretty pumped.

Until I started to get ready for it. As I prayed, I really felt God leading me to "expose myself" and share from a really vulnerable place. The topic I was to be sharing...Rejection. Ouch. Turns out that I know a little about that topic. Then I got words from many of you that confirmed what God was telling me. So I went for it.

Let me tell you, you can come to terms with a lot of things in your life. But when you have to say them OUT LOUD...IN PUBLIC, that is just something totally different. I was crying before I even started class. I stood up and saw one of my friends from across the room and mouth to her, "I don't think I can do this." So she prayed and I cried some more. It turned out really good though.

Through that and the other classes, God has totally been working in the students' hearts. Last night, we had an awesome time of ministering. The students were broken. A few of them were actually weeping (most were crying). God gave us words. It was beautiful.

Thank you so much for your prayers!

Des

PS- It is my birthday tomorrow. Feel free to shower me with attention ;)

Christmas at Home

2008-01-07T23:12:00.000-08:00

So, my time at home has been breathtaking. I couldn't have planned a more blessed or meaningful time. God went OUT OF HIS WAY to provide me with opportunities that I never thought I would have. I got to see so many significant people. Let me explain through the pictures... My BROTHER!!! Many of you have heard me talk about my brother (Sonia's best friend who is just a part of our family). Well, I hadn't met him yet officially. So he surprised us and spent Christmas with our family. Those are "nice to meet you" flowers. So sweet! I love him.
I called my childhood best friend to get together and it turns out that our other best friend was in town from Idaho, so we had a whole high school reunion pretty much. There is one pretty pregnant Anne, Shawna (whom I hadn't seen in YEARS), Stephanie, and Joy (my best friend since first grade).
This was a special moment taken between me and a bag of Christmas blend Starbucks.
Ok. So the day after I got back to the States, my family and I went up to a cabin in Sedona. It was great. Snow on the ground. This was a picture Seriah and I took in front.
I got to fly out to Michigan TO FINALLY MEET MY FAMILY on my mom's side. AMAZING. This is my sister and I with our grandpa. I can't even put words to how significant this trip was to me. It was like finding a piece of me that had been missing for years.
Here I am with my aunt Maria and my precious cousin Amanda.
This was my sister and I in front of Stephanie's memorial tree. My aunt Sonia on the right lost her daughter (my cousin) to cancer this year after a 2.5 year battle. This was our first Christmas without her.

Here are my other precious little cousins. Amanda, Savanna, and Faith. They are stinkin cute.

I will also be leaving on Thursday to visit my old base in Mexico. So I will get to see my old friends.

It has all been so rich. I will never forget this Christmas. God was on a mission to surprise me, delight me, and bless me in every way imaginable. Thank you, Lord.

Stories

2007-11-29T10:34:00.000-08:00

Man, I just read Rachel's blog and am going to reference you there because she did a good job capturing our experience. (The link is under my favorite links and has the word Rachel in it. Sorry, I don't have it in front of me, but you are all bright people).

Another school has past. I have just completed my third semester with YWAM Medellin. This was one of my favorite and most challenging outreaches.

I love the work we did get to do. Highlights- Fefa and I were eating at a family's house for two weeks and got to see a clear picture of what the family was going through. All Christian, but hugely suffering in silence. The father had a past of being abusive, the son had gotten into huge trouble as an adolencent (involvement with a homocide) which very much affected the family. And no one talked about it. There was so much hurt. So much unforgiveness. But so much desire to more forward in life and forgive.

The last night, Fefa and I sat them down as a family and started to tell them what we saw and what we felt like the Lord had for them. We talked about the effects of violence in the family. How it needs to be dealt with. And they had a beautiful time of asking for forgiveness from one another and speaking words of blessing. Then we prayed for all of them. It was awesome. The next day, there was a whole different feel in the house. Lightness. Love. Hope. I left so aware that we had really changed the course of their destiny.

The challenging part was that it was hard for people to trust us and consider us authorities for our ages. I was the oldest by...five years? Six? So many people missed their opportunities to receive help by not opening up.

I will be home soon. As you know, I do not have a cell phone, so the best way to get ahold of me is still via email. :)

Photos from the Amazon

2007-11-28T10:32:00.000-08:00

Half Way Point

2007-10-29T06:07:00.000-07:00

Our time in Macedonia has been amazing. The community has totally opened up to us and has received us with full confidence.

We are working mostly with the local schools, teaching on relationships,identity, and what it means to have a relationship with the Lord.

They are so open!

And it is the most beautiful place on Earth I have ever seen. Raw creation. It is delightful.

Pray for wisdom for me. There are some complicated things going on with the pastor. I need wisdom to know how to confront it and do what is best for the community.

The picture above was taking in a time of counseling with one of the girls in Filadelfia. She was the one I got the cool word for. So much need...

Off to Macedonia

2007-10-23T07:36:00.000-07:00

We are heading out to Macedonia right now. We will be out of contact for two weeks.

Please pray for our health (we have been a little stomach sick).
Please also pray that we would have a special grace with the people to win their trust. (They are not quick to trust from centuries of abuse).

Blessings,
Desteni

Filadelfia and Leticia

2007-10-20T07:33:00.000-07:00

The first three weeks of outreach have been amazing. Unfortunately my camera is locked in a woman´s apartment right now, so I can upload any pictures. I wanted to share some of the stories though.

We arrived in the river community Filadelfia on October 3rd. It was so great. I stayed there last year for a very short period of time, but for some reason I fell in love with the people there. My heart felt so full to see the missionary and his family again. He is Brazilian and she is Ticuna (an indigenous tribe in the region)and their kids are all adorable.

Our team ended up working with the local church there, staying with the pastor and his wife.

We had our difficulties at first. The culture isn´t given to trusting people immediately, especially after having some bad experiences with missionaries in the past. Normally we give conferences at night, and have one on one counseling session in the afternoon, and prep time in the morning. Well, they were not open to having counseling times. That´s ok, because we´ll just go out in the community and talk to people...no...not that either, you can´t do that without a Ticuna guide or people won´t talk to you. Well maybe we can...NO. Alright. So the first week was complicated in that sense. Oddly, though we are a counseling team, every person on my team is really strong in dance and drama. So we thought of teaching the youth a dance in the mornings so that we could at least have contact with them. They were all about that. We broke up into small groups to begin with and processed what they learned the night before in the classes we were giving.

The trust really grew. People would still not open up though, so I just started talking to them about what God was telling me about their lives. (That is always fun and scary for people- "Hey, this this and this is going on in your life and you feel like this and this. God wants you to know this and this. Do you want to talk about it?") They would affirm everything I was saying, cry, and not respond. Until the last night. One girl I had been praying for finally opened up and shared what was going on in her life. God have given me a really cool word for her and I wrote it down so she wouldn´t forget it.

Then we had a tearful goodbye and made our way to the city.

This week has been full of counseling. Rachel and I took on the teaching load and taught every night. Very receptive. They too, would be very touch and not want to talk about it. That´s ok. We are working with a really neat guy in counseling. I have high hopes that God is going to make some radical decision to change his life. He wants it.

And- No weird illness. Every Fefa, would is allergic to mosquitos (bad for being in the Amazon) has NOT HAD ANY REACTIONS. Thank you for praying.

Change of Address

2007-09-29T19:57:00.000-07:00

Please note that we are in the process of moving. If you would like to send me a package, please write to me first so that I can send you the new address. If you send it here, they have no forwarding services. So it won't get to me :)
Thanks!

Back to the Amazon

2007-09-29T19:05:00.000-07:00

Well, something funky is going on with the site, so the pictures are out of order...let's be flexible.

Tomorrow morning I will be heading out to the Amazon again. I am taking a mighty team of four women (including myself). Rachel (of course you know who Rachel is), Lorena (21), and Stephanie (aka Fefa 17). Some might laugh at the thought of receiving a team of counselors and then...surprise! They are four girls with the average age of...you do the math. But I have full confidence in our team and believe that He has given us sufficient gifts and passion to really bless the people there.

We are going to be going to different towns/cities along the Amazon River. I will have the HUGE blessing of being able to return to the little community where I was last year. We are starting our outreach there for two weeks, working alongside the DTS team (which should be interesting and challenging but good). Then we will be in Leticia, Tabatinga (Brazil), another river community on the Colombian side, and...other places that we don't even know because they are unconfirmed!!! Yes!!

We need prayer! Like crazy.

1. Pray for safety/health. Last time I was there we were drinking rain water. Yum. We can have a parasite competition in the group. Or maybe we can go to new frontiers like typhoid!! Weeee! Good news is that I have health insurance. Good stuff. They will even fly me back to Medellin if I need it. (Like THAT would ever happen...wait...this sounds oddly familiar...) There is also malaria, more dengue...who are we kidding. It is the jungle. Prayer for health is not going to be in vane.

2. Language/Communication Barriers. Guess what they speak in Brazil...NOT Spanish. So me, Rachel (who is still working on Spanish) and two Colombian girls are going to give conferences to people who speak Portuguese and Ticuna. If I need to translate, that is going to be interesting, since I haven't really practiced Portuguese in...six years? Pray that the three weeks that we are in Brazil would be amazing at that people will understand us (and that we would understand them).

3. Team sanity. I am leading. Enough said.

No seriously, when you are intentionally jumping into the middle of the hurt and sin of people and families, there is NATURAL emotional stress not to mention SUPERNATURAL opposition. We need spiritual covering.

4. Wisdom. Discernment. Boldness. Creativity. All absolutely necessary. Please pray especially for me as I am leading the team.

5. Pray that God would use us greatly and that we would allow ourselves to be used greatly.

Just pray alright? Why are you still reading this...you should be praying!

But first, I must address the burning question in your hearts. Did Desteni do something to her hair?? Why yes. I went to get the roots done again (since post-black hair trauma) and my hairdresser decided that I wasn't white enough so he went just a wee bit more blond that we were going for. But hey, it is still cute.

Now, with that inspiration...on your knees people!

Brigade Update...Finally

2007-09-06T17:32:00.000-07:00

Clowns to entertain the people waiting to see the doctor.
My director and I. I am trying to stab him with my Peace flag.
Karen Lorena and I. She was a part of team Dengue when we all got sick.
Morning devotional.

This last brigade was amazing. God provided so much and so many things came together, that we knew that He was going to work in a special way. There is so much to tell...

Pre-Arrival

I had written to various supporters to see if they wanted to help with the brigade. Thanks to the offerings of a group of people, we were able to take hundreds of dollars of clothes and medication to the people of Tierradentro.

Adorable story I must tell. My beautiful, amazing, missionary nieces worked to be able to send special presents to the kids in this village. So this section is for them.

Auntie Xuxa (I) bought clothes and a special puppy to give to a little girl there with the money you gave them.

Xuxa crossing the river with puppy.
Puppy loved the river. She was there with my other team members.
I loved puppy very much and gave her one last hug before giving her to Adriana.
I told little Adriana that I needed her to take care of Puppy for me. She loved her, too. She even took her to the Pact for Peace event and had a little blanket to cover her from the rain! (Soooo stinkin cute).

Arrival-

We left Thursday night at traveled all night. (My non spiritual story that is a taste of what it is like to live cross-culturally...I went and got my seat on the bus in back. I go and a woman and her TWO CHILDREN were all in one seat. Like the kids are really going to sit stacked there for SEVEN HOURS. So the woman and her children, another adult woman, and I all squeezed into two seats. That was exciting. I, honestly, was furious. They also sold too many tickets and three people had to stand, yet pay the same price. I sat silently and tried not to breathe fire. The other woman made a bed on the ground for the children and offered her them her food. She showed me Christ.)

Other highlights- we were so tired that we slept on the ground at the bus station with homeless people. Then we got caught in mud on the way there are were stuck for an hour. (This will get more spiritual...I promise).

Look, Mom! I can mud skate!
Mom, no worries! Everyone needs to sleep on the ground in a public place at one point of their lives. Live on the edge.

We arrived and went immediately to work. I was working between counseling and with the youth. I did get to attend a couple of people, but it wasn't a very counseling happy place. So I put myself to work with the youth and WOW. I loved it! I even had a special class with the girls to talk about sex and relationships. It was so much...well, I was going to say fun, but that isn't the word. It was enriching. We had a time of ministering afterwards and three of the girls from the Cartagena team came up to me to tell me how much it had blessed them also. I got to talk to a 12 yr old girl and explain why it was not a good idea to run away and get married. She got it. I was glad.

I was also working closely with my friend Jhonny who also had a great time with the guys. There is so much need there among the youth. They have been through so many horrible things, and have so much immorality. We were really impacted by the need for discipleship there.

The youth we were working with.
I would be the white girl on the left. I think... No wait. That is another girl. Ha! So what. I was still there.
Team praying beforehand.

Me praying over people from the community.

We finished the event with a Pact for Peace. Members from the community, along with representatives from the government, schools, hospitals, etc came to make public commits to peace in their area of influence. There was also a time of forgiveness for those that had committed acts of violence against them.

God's Protection-
Tierradentro is not a safe place. The night before we left, a man was tortured and murdered in the village. We were assured it was an act of revenge, but still, I prayed to make sure I had God's blessing in going. I had a vision of a warrior angel with a huge sword to fight for me. So I felt confident in going. We went there and in orientation that pastor told us that we were not allow to leave the building alone. And we should try not to be outside too much. We (the foreigners) slept together next door to the military post. The intention was great, but the security sucked. The building was open to the street because the wall had been bombed out last October. The locks on the door were nails that you just had to push with a little force to open. The last night, two insurgents scoped out our night service, letting us know without using so many words that they knew we were there. The next morning, they sent us back early in a separate car to throw off any attempt at us. The pastors asked that, though they loved us and God used us amazingly, that they not send foreigners next time. It was a sobering time to know that God really did protect us. He knew we didn't know the degree of danger there and He honored us. So I will not be able to go back there unfortunately until it stabelizes more. That makes me sad because I really did love so many people there and have a burden for the work.

I will post more pictures soon to tell more stories.

Another Brigade!!!

2007-08-22T19:10:00.000-07:00

Thursday night we are leaving for a health brigade that will last until Monday morning. So exciting!!

We are going to Tierra Adentro, a place that has been very affected by the violence. There is so much need there and the people are so open.

I will write more details when I get back.

Please pray for our safety. This is a red zone that we are going to. There is military presence and they will be protecting us (the only way that we would choose to go), but please pray that there would be no need for the military :) I long for God to touch lives of those that are into things they shouldn't be in terms of the war here.

We are going to do a pact against violence with the whole community. Pray that it would be a decision that each would make consciously, before God. Pray that there is understanding.

Blessings,
Desteni

La Maestra

2007-08-01T16:26:00.000-07:00

A quick update.

This week we are doing Family Systems in the counseling school and...drum roll...I am going to teach on Friday. I am excited, but really nervous and stressed!

Pray that God would use me and guide me!

March Against FARC

2007-07-05T18:36:00.000-07:00

Today, hundreds of thousands of people gathered in the center of Medellin to participate in a march against the kidnappings of the FARC (the guerrilla). Recently 11 political figures were killed after being held for about five years. There response to the public was that they were really sorry that they had to do that, but that it was ultimately the governments fault for not making a deal with them.
Colombians from all over the nationed wore white and went to publically protest.
Six of us from the base participated.
I have never experienced anything like it. It was so moving. Hearing the cries of the people- calling out for freedom...freedom from the kidnappings, freedom from living in fear, freedom from those that are currently held captive.
As I marched with thousands of people, all I could think about was the Israelites in their captivity in Egypt. It says over and over again that God heard the cry of his people. I am sure that God was moved by what He saw today.
A famous latin singer (Juanes) was there and sang part of a song that he wrote with the following lyrics
"I dream of freedom for those that are kidnapped in the middle of the jungle and I dream of peace in the middle of a bloody nation and with the end of this unjust war."
But I couldn't see him because my vision was blocked by signs the face of a young man who had been kidnapped just weeks ago...
http://picasaweb.google.com/home March Against Kidnapping

Back to School

2007-07-04T04:45:00.000-07:00

Hooray! We have officially begun the second semester of school.

I am blissfully happy to report that I am working with the Intrduction to Biblical Counseling as a pastora! Yeah!! We are already off to a great start. The girls are very open and I can just sense all that God wants to do in their lives. I feel very expectant.

And the DTS is going well, too. They have a really great group. The atmosphere is totally different than the last school. It is calm. Way more peace.

And what better way to start off the semester than with RACHEL'S FAMILY coming to visit. I finally got to meet her parents and was able to see Abby. Love them. I felt like my own family was here.

Upcoming Challenges

2007-06-25T13:50:00.000-07:00

There are somethings I don't typically share, because it is not as exciting to hear. But there are some very real things happening here that are taking up a lot of prayer time.

The house that we rent is going to be torn down in order to build a big apartment complex. (This sounds like a Brady Bunch episode). Our renters gave us a smoking deal on the rent, so now we are faced with the dilema that we have grown and now have to move to what is hopefully a bigger house. Bigger house means more rent. Ideally, we would like to buy a house, but since the move will probably happen within the next three months, we are looking to rent for now.

I wish you guys could appreciate the financial situation we are in. We eat rice, beans, plantains, and eggs, because it is the least expensive food there is. Rachel and I buy our own fruit because we would never see it otherwise. They are very good stewards of every peso spent. Conserving water, light, gas, you name it.

So the thought of having to pay about $500 more a month is concerning. If any of you would like to make a monthly commitment to help with the rent, please let me know.

My other challenge is something I like to call coming home for Christmas. I had some money saved and it was wiped out with my whole "dengue extravaganza" (ie surprise flight home, hospital bill, medication, etc). So if I would like to come home for Christmas (which I do), I am going to need extra help in order to save towards this goal. Again, if you are interested, please let me know :)

Blessings,

Desteni

It Was Worth It

2007-06-18T09:10:00.000-07:00

Saturday night, twelve students graduated from our DTS. I do not normally get emotional at events like this. But this time was different. This whole graduation was different. I stood up to give the final reflection to the students and wept. Why? Because I could see the fruit of what God had done in their lives, through all of the difficulties and mistakes. These students are definitely not the same as when they came. It was a hard school, for the staff and students alike. But in the end, it was agreed that the theme of this graduation was "It was worth it."

One of the girls that almost got sent home sang a song at the ceremony called (translated) "Look at what God has done in me" and I don't think there was a single dry eye. She couldn't sing in parts because she was crying, too. Ugg. I cry just remembering it. God really did miraculous things in the lives of the students and my prayer for them is that they would continue to walk in it. That they would remember who they are. That they would remember what God has done.

WHAT NOW?

Our next set of schools start in two weeks. Next week we will be told what our functions will be. I am hoping to work with the Intro to Biblical Counseling, but I may be needed in the DTS again. Many of our staff are taking the semester to study at other YWAM bases, or are going to be on sabatical. Lots of transition. It should be challenging. We are also going to have many different nations represented, which should be a blessing and again, a challenge.

HEALTH UPDATE

Many of you have been concerned for my health. I am now healed from dengue and functioning at 100%. Thank you for your prayers.

*To see more pictures from outreach, please click on my picture link.

2007-06-05T09:04:00.000-07:00

Real Update!

2007-05-29T08:43:00.001-07:00

As I promised, here are some stories from outreach. This little angel is Gina. Her mom brought her in for counseling, along with her teacher, because she was having trouble in school. One day she could write her name, and the next day she couldn't. They told me (right in front of her) that they thought she might be mentally handicapped. So I talked to the girl by herself, and what a doll! Nothing wrong with her. She did mention that she has no one to play with and that she plays with an old dish towel by herself in her room. (I made sure that we got her one of the dolls that was donated- see photo below). And she told me enough to know that there was stuff going on in her house.

So I brought her mom in and gently explained to her that when children don't have their basic needs met (love, safety, security, etc), they can't perform in school. So she mentioned, "Oh, by the way, she was raped by her neighbor last year." Now, I am no Nancy Drew, but maybe there is a connection? Oh, I was so mad and heartbroken for this little girl. Here she had been through this TRAUMA, and her family responds by calling her retarded, saying that she was slutty because she puts on high heels and wants to be a singer. AH! So she became my special most specialest friend at the brigade. She was with me all the time. I made a big deal about her doing everything with me, that I picked HER to be my helper, etc. And one day I was in a counseling session and I asked if she could stay in the room in there with us. Why? Because she randomly sat down and said, "Do you want to see me write my name?" I almost cried. When she feels loved and special, all of those secondary things just come. Of course she can write her name when people believe in her. This was another little girl named Jinet in another city. She brought me mangos every day. So cute.
These were two sisters that came in for counseling. We had a great time. She wept and wept. But it breaks my heart that we can't do follow up. One counseling session can't undo years of heart break. Pray that God would send godly women to Callejas to disciple these young girls.
After being on this outreach, it is more evident to me my passion to work in counseling and with the family. I really want to continue growing in this area. I especially want to study more on sexual abuse in the family. So predominant here! Especially in the smaller towns. It is so heartbreaking and families just don't know how to deal with it.

Update on my health- I am dengue free. I did my blood control test yesterday and my platelets are back to normal. Thank you for praying!

Sent Home

2007-05-25T14:02:00.000-07:00

Yesterday my platelets dropped 22.000 and I needed to be hospitalized. So I talked to my director and he asked me to come from outreach immediately to receive treatment in Medellin. (Medellin has the best medical in Colombia). So I flew home this morning and went to the emergency room here. My platelets stabelized again so I got to come home.

Dengue isn't as fun as a goiter. No word with the sound "dang" in it can be really fun. I will work on making it funny somehow. Just give me a sec.

The good news though is that after five months my boxes got here that I send myself over Christmas. Who knows what in the world took so long, but they are here!!!

And I still am planning on doing a big update about outreach soon. I have to rest now though (doctors orders :)

Love
Des

Please Pray

2007-05-22T12:56:00.000-07:00

Please forgive me for my lack of ability to update. It turns out that I got pretty sick. I went to the hospital and I have dengue.

Dengue is a tropical illness trasmitted by mosquitos.
For more info go to the following site
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dengue_fever

But please pray. I finally stopped throwing up after they took me to the hospital, but I am starting to feel naseated again. I have got to be able to keep food down though soon.

Thank you. Don´t worry. I am going to be ok. They are taking very good care of me.

Love
Des

Ummm Almost Updated

2007-05-14T16:04:00.000-07:00

Well, I dont have time right now to update as I thought, BUT luckily Rachel did. Check out her site for the latest...
www.rachelanman.blogspot.com

Off to outreach

2007-04-22T18:59:00.000-07:00

These three crazy women are about to lead an outreach together to Cordoba. Did they really think that one through well???

On Tuesday morning we will be headed out to Cordoba to do the health brigade and to start the rest of our two month outreach. We will be in Tierra Alta, El Palmar, Bijao, and Pica Pica. The rest of the team will end up in Tierra Adentro, but the road is too dangerous for Rachel and I to go there. (We are still not sure if they will send us to another city or just send us home).

Prayer requests:
It is still not certain that all of our team will go. Out of nowhere, we are having trouble with one of our professional students. We are praying that if God sees in her heart that she will not determine to be a blessing, that that would be made known so that we don't send her.

Pray for the physical and spiritual protection of all of the teams. We are going to the safest place and the other two groups are going to red zones (not safe because of the war). Those teams do not have any foreigners on them.

Pray THAT GOD WOULD USE US! That we would have His passion and His heart for each of the places and that He would use us in great ways!

On another note...

You may have noticed...hey, Desteni has black hair. Of course I do. Why wouldn't I? I was trying to go back to my natural color (dark brown) and well...

There you have it. Not dark brown. If I were going to sell that product, that would be the name I'd give it "Not dark brown."

Anyway, going back to the original intention for this post-

I am leaving for outreach. That means less posts, less contact with me, less pictures available. I do have a laptop, but I get to my outreach locational in a small canoe. I don't think I need to explain more on that one. So even though the contact will be less, I need even more prayer.

Blessings,

Desteni

The Baby

2007-04-13T15:37:00.000-07:00

Karen, this is for you!

Finally.

2007-04-13T15:11:00.000-07:00

Finally. There is resolution in the school. After 137 trillion meetings with staff, students, leaders, Jesus, pizza delivery guy (heck, YOU were probably in some of the meetings), we have come to a decision on the students on the outreach teams.

Three students were asked to leave, and six are going on probation (meaning that we will let them go on outreach conditional upon their behavior). It is sad because I really love two of the students leaving, but we made the right decision. It was too big of a risk taking them.

Since people are leaving, we had to restructure the teams. Only one of my original students is going with us :( But they chose really well. They are really well balanced teams and I am excited for it.

We have two of the professional students (adults) Claudia and Paula, then Ingrid and Juan Daniel. I will try to post a team pic soon!

Happy Easter

2007-04-11T15:06:00.000-07:00

EASTER!!!

Well, this was mine and Rachel's big Easter celebration. We hid the egg candles her mom got us and spelled out Happy Easter with our bodies. Now, people don't celebrate Easter here, so all of this was scary and amusing to them.

And I know I haven't updated on the students in awhile. I just keep waiting. On Monday, we pulled nine of the students into a meeting to let them know that we were seriously considering not letting them go on outreach. We were ready to make that decision. We have prayed and feel like some of them still have hope. So we are watching and praying for guidance.

Destination...CORDOBA

2007-04-01T12:38:00.000-07:00

In three weeks I will be heading out with a team of students to Tierra Alta to participate in a Health Brigade. In all my experiences in missions, I have the feeling that this will be something that forever marks my life.

HISTORY

Most people don´t realize that Colombia is in a war. There are three different groups that are constantly battling for domination over certain areas. One of the groups will come and drive people out of their homes. Thousands have had to flee for their lives. So where do they go? Colombian refugees make their own little communities in the nearest "safe" place. They have nothing except what the government helps them with for six months: seeds and training how to cultivate their own food. They have lost everything, family members, security, all of their possessions, and have to start all over from scratch- broken.

Four times a year YWAM organizes a Health Brigade to be able to offer relief and consolation to these people. We take doctors, psychologists, dentists, carpenters, beauticians, nutritionists, etc to come and offer aid. We take clothes, medications, house supplies, mattresses, all which have been donated by local Colombians.

HOW ARE WE GOING TO PARTICIPATE?

My team will be divided. We have a nurse and a physical therapist that are going to be offering their services. My team will be in charge of evangelism, which is the focus of the brigade. If people can´t know Jesus, we are just providing band aids for gaping wounds.

I will be working in the area of counseling. That is going to be a huge challenge for me, one that is going to force me to CLING to Him for WISDOM. My director was telling me that she talked to a woman who was eating breakfast one morning with her four kids and a group came in and killed all of her children in front of her, leaving them at the table. No amount of wisdom can speak into those wounds. I need Jesus so much to use me as a vessel of His presence. I feel as though I will actually be going into hell to bring His mercy and comfort. I am not sure I will ever be the same after this.

HOW CAN YOU PARTICIPATE?

We need clothes, medication, MONEY. It is going to cost us about $6000 USD to pull this off. If you would like to send a donation, for time purposes, it would be best to send it to my house (let me know and I will get you the address). Personally, I do not have all of the finances I need to go. Lots of last minute purchases and expenses that I wasn´t aware of. (ie a tent, transportation, uniforms, rain boots, a mosquito net, etc etc and etc). If you would like to help, please send checks, again, to my parents house and distinguish whether it is for me or for the brigade.

PLEASE PRAY

I would like to invite you to make a commitment to pray for us, at least until May 1st. I am asking you to pray in groups, to fast, to really become apart of what we are doing to reach these people.

Please pray that:

1. That God would pour His Spirit upon us and give us a special anointing to do the work that He has put in our hearts.

2. For SAFETY. The area is safe enough for us to go, but it is near dangerous areas.

3. Our health. There is a big malaria risk in this area. It is also pretty unhygienic.

4. Pray for the salvation of the people there. They they would come to know Christ truly as a SAVIOR. As the PRINCE OF PEACE.

5. Pray that the insurgents living in the area would come to know the Lord and would find a way out of the lifestyle they have been living.

6. Pray that we find transportation that will take all of the good the whole way there (which requires crossing a river on a raft).

7. Pray for protection in our relationships. (Best way for the enemy to botch up what we are doing is to bring division among us or conflict).

8. That God would speak to people and touch them in a way that only He can.

Please note also that my leaders are very responsible in where they send us. If they perceive that a place is too dangerous to go, they will not allow us to. In fact, we will not be going to one of the city with our outreach team because the road to get there is too dangerous for foreigners. We are also going as a humanitarian relief group, which is very respected even among insurgents. Do not be afraid.

Lots of News

2007-03-25T12:31:00.000-07:00

This is our precious little Danna Carolina, our new baby at the base. She is almost two weeks old now and she is more ridiculously precious than should be allowed.

In other news, it was announced on Friday that I will be leading a team to the coast for outreach. This was a huge surprise for me since I haven't been working with the school. But the other leader is starting another school that will run through outreach and they needed another leader. I will be leading with two other girls (which will be a HUGE blessing, since one of them is Rachel and we work amazingly well together). We will be working at a medical brigade for Colombian refugees in Tierra Adentro, and various places on the coast (Cordoba).

God is so cool. I love how He uses us to bless one another. The other day one of our students was crying. Rachel went to talked to her. She was discouraged about her team she was put on for outreach (with none of her friends), and confessed that she didn't have any of the necessary items for a part of training we do called NIKO. (It is kind of like a survival camp in the mountains). So Rachel and I gladly snuck out and went shopping for her to get her everything she needed. And when we got there, I just had it on my heart to go even beyond that to bless her with a couple of shirts (like most people who come, she has put on a little weight and her clothes are now too small). So we threw a couple of shirts in there, too. We snuck back into the house and I began writing her a letter to leave it all on her bed. God began to speak to me, and I wrote what I believe the Lord wanted to show her. We left it on her bed and went back to my room.

Shortly thereafter, she came home. Even from our room, we could hear shrieks and screaming. So we were thinking, "Cool, I am glad she liked it." A few minutes later she came in with tears running down her face. She choked out that she was going through so much at the moment. Her mom is in the States and hasn't been able to talk to her. In the letter I wrote her, I wrote, "Princess, don't worry." And bawling she explained how her mom is the only one who calls her Princess. God was so intimately taking care of her in the moment. Soooo cool.

God just works like that. It was so fun for Rachel and I. We were more than happy to help. God put the desire in our hearts and used it to bless her. So simple yet so rewarding.

In The Trenches

2007-03-19T12:41:00.000-07:00

I love this picture. It is the picture of how I feel right now.

Sometimes I wish I could just control people and force them to make good decisions. I look at the students sometimes and just want to shake them and tell them, "Don't you realize that that is going to hurt you! That is a bad idea." But they continue on with it.

How God must suffer with us. What was He THINKING when He gave us a free will? I can't even grasp how much He loves us, yet watches us do things that He told us not to all the time. Why can't I grasp that His "rules" (as they are often viewed) are not to bind us, it is because doing it any other way will HURT us.

Some of the students made some decision last night that could really have lifelong effects. Leadership has the responsibility to decide how to handle it.

I feel sad. Disappointed. Frustrated...

Am I still on the same planet???

2007-03-16T14:40:00.000-07:00

Ok, many of you ask me if it is hard to live in another country. Many days, I am a fish in water. I couldn't fathom living anywhere else in the world. Then there are other days...

For the humorous side, please refer to Rachel's blog, because she explained it artfully. It is the entry from March 15.

http://rachelanman.blogspot.com/

Just imagine where you have to look people in the eye when they are telling you these things and fully expecting you to comply! Some days you just want to scream!!!

I have more to say on the subject, but instead of mixing funny with serious (I don't want to overwhelm you) I will just stop for now.

What is going on here??!!

2007-03-11T15:02:00.000-07:00

Friday morning. Rachel and I get up at 4am to intercede for the school and to exercise. When around 4:30 we here a whole mariachi band down the road playing. What the?! IT IS 4:30 IN THE MORNING. So we didn't really think anything of it, and walked back to the house. I get in the shower. Then I hear all of the MALE STUDENTS in the hall and they start serenading the girls' rooms. What is going on??! There is POETRY that the guys had written hung up over the walls. They all dressed up and escorted us down to the devotional. There we were all given flowers and told how much we were appreciated (this happened three different times through out the day). Parents were calling off the hook. Rachel and I were introduced to the very import holiday in Colombia- the day of the woman.

All of the girls anxiously asked Rachel and I how we celebrate it in the States. We looked at each other and agreed that if this holiday exists, it is between national pencil day and peanut butter appreciation day. They couldn't believe that we celebrate Columbus day and we don't celebrate women.

It was nice to be celebrated, but I have lived 26 full years without it. So no worries USA, I'm not mad at you.

Picture to come...

Ena

2007-03-04T12:38:00.000-08:00

Last weekend I was finally able to take Ena out for her birthday. I am not sure who was more blessed, her or I. There were times when she was nearly in tears, overwhelmed at what was going on. Then I was nearly in tears blessing our meal and saying a blessing over her life. I just love this girl.

So what did we do? First I picked up her and friend and took them to the mall. Shopping. I am not sure anyone has ever taken her shopping before. She picked out shoes, jeans, two shirts and some hair products. Then we went to see The Pursuit of Happiness. Great choice! Then we went to Crepes and Waffles, a nice restaurant, where I bought them lunch and desert. So fun!

I also brought a curling iron back from the States for her. Now, every time I see her, her hair is down and beautifully curled.

On a sad note though, when we were walking back, she opened up to me and told me that her grandpa was in the hospital. For her to mention it, I knew that it was really upsetting her. He was the one who raised her. So I asked her today how he was and she told me she borrowed some money so she could call home and they told her that he died two weeks ago. I could tell she was affected, but she just shrugged it off. It broke my heart to see that she has never been taught or allowed to grieve. So much pain in her life (this is now the fifth close relative that has died in her life, including her dad and two siblings). And she talks about it as though she is not allowed to feel.

Please pray with me for her, that she would find the freedom to mourn and that she would be comforted.

WOW! Revelation. Jesus says, "Blessed are those that mourn, for they will be comforted." The key to that promise is MOURNING. Until we can mourn, we cannot be comforted.

*Point of reflection- Are there areas of my life where I have not allowed myself to mourn? Where have I now allowed the comfort of the Lord in not allowing myself to mourn?

What do you expect?

2007-02-26T09:24:00.000-08:00

Last year my mom and I were in the kitchen talking and my six year old niece came running in. She had been watching Spiderman and was jazzed. "Grandma!! I wish I had all of those powers!!" So my mom responded, "Really? And what would you do with all of those powers?" "I would go alllll over the world and gather up all the bad guys and allll the criminals..." I have to pause before continuing. My niece has a very developed notion of justice. Her dad has a criminal past and police have just been a reality in her life. She knows very well that if you do something wrong, there are consequences. Knowing this about her, I had my expectations about what she was going to say. "I would gather them up and send them all to jail." "I would create an island where they would all go to be spanked." I am not sure what exactly I was expecting her to say, but it certainly wasn't what she said. "I would go alll over the world and gather up all the bad guys and I would take them to heaven so that they could meet Jesus and He could teach them how to obey the Father". My mom and I stood there speakless and both a little teary.

How often do we come into God's presence with the expectation of punishment? How often do we avoid going to Him for the way we believe He will receive us? Intellectually, I know of the Father's heart for me. His unconditional love. His acceptance and mercy. Yet it is still a battle to walk in this reality in my daily life. How often do we come before God ashamed, feeling inadequate,feeling disappointing- like we just haven't done enough for him, feeling guilty because of relationship conflicts, feeling like if we could be just a little bit better...

God never intended for us to fear Him. Even after the Fall, we don't see God responding in outrage and rejection. He asked, "Where are you? Why are you hiding?" Upon the confession of their sin, He provided clothes for them. He didn't throw them on the ground at them and wait for them to put them on. God DRESSED them. An act of acceptance and help in spite of their mistake.

Hebrews 4:16 says "Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need." In the face of our need, God wants us to approach his throne with confidence. In the Greek, that word means, freedom in speech, without hiding or concealment, cheerful courage.

He SEES all of our being and all of our actions, and He loves us. Are you willing to let yourself be seen and accepted by Him? Are you willing to risk showing Him where you feel inadequate, unworthy, ashamed, so that He can love that part of you?

Thanks!

2007-02-13T11:26:00.000-08:00

Many of you sent books to my house over the holidays for me to bring back to the base. So far, they have been a hit. I had one girl come up to me just to tell me how much her and her whole small group were being blessed by the book Waking the Dead by John Eldredge. So I wanted to thank those of you who sent the books. They are making an impact here!

2007-02-07T08:53:00.000-08:00

Last year Karen and I paid for Jhon David and Keilen to eat at the feeding center for a couple of months. This weekend when I went back, I wanted to pay for Keilen again. Karen warned me to ask if they had been going. It is such an impoverished mentality, that sometimes parents won't even send their children to eat the food someone has paid for and prepared for them. So I asked Jhon David about it.
"Jhon David, did you guys go to the feeding center these past months?"
"YES! AND WE DIDN'T EVEN HAVE TO PAY!"
I tear up just thinking about it. To us, it is a meal that costs about $.08 a day. To him, it was like getting to eat at his favorite restaurant for the year and not having to pay. Isaiah 55 kept coming to mind, "Come all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost."
It is so easy for me to bless him with food. It costs me nothing. Yet it means the world to him. And it really made me meditate this morning on how much God wants to give us. The desires of our heart that seem like our very livelihood. He is so willing to satisfy those needs.

In what area in your life do you feel like the Lord is holding back on you? Where He is just not willing to bless you? Will you allow Him to show you His heart towards you?